As I open yet another can of soda I ask myself, “what am I doing? I am trying to lose weight so how did I end up with a soda in my hand…again?”
It’s self sabotage. We hold ourselves back. We are on such a good path and then we veer off the road… yet the whole time we know it’s our own doing. So why do we keep doing it?
I watched Rob Fore’s Mindset Mastery training today and I learned about whats really holding us back and how to keep it from doing that!
There is a real reason behind our self sabotage, a need for survival. In the video Fore tells two peoples story’s: a woman who keeps sabotaging her weight loss efforts and a man who makes money only to lose it all! Looking into each of their unconscious beliefs gives an insight into the reality of why they keep failing. The woman was abused as a child and holds a deep belief that being attractive can cause this to happen again. The man beliefs that succeeding will make him selfish and keep him from going to heaven. Both these beliefs were strong and hidden deep inside! We all have unconscious beliefs that drive our conscious actions. “Beliefs control behavior” (Fore) and the need for survival always wins.
Every time we find ourselves doing something we know we are not supposed to be doing or not doing something we know we should be doing we “are encountering a dis-empowering belief” somethings deep inside is keeping us from moving forward.
Okay so we get it, we know that previous hurts and hangups are holding you back…but how do we get rid of them? How do we overcome this issue? Rob Fore gives us a formula. He also challenges us to actually follow it because chances are, we wont. Chances are that the majority of people reading this will continue to live life unhappy and unsuccessful. So before you go on, make the decision that you will no longer hold yourself back!
So these the three steps to overcoming the hurt and hangups that are holding you back:
Step 1: Know what you want.
Step 2: Make unconscious priority.
Step 3: Remove roadblocks.
You start with accessing whats called a Perfect 10 Memory. Think back to a moment where everything was perfect. Find a memory where you had physical, emotional, and spiritual well being. Once you have thought of the memory, write it down and describe it in detail. How did you feel? How did your body feel? Was your heart beating fast? These feelings are what you really want. These are the feelings that you want to feel again and these are the feelings that you are not feeling when you let your unconscious thoughts hold you back.
So now you need to create a fair target objective. This is a statement saying what you want and by when you want it. State it as happening. For example ” On or before July 27th of 2016 I will weigh 128 lbs and I will have achieved this by eating healthy and working out everyday.” or “On or before November 30th of 2016 I will be making $3000 monthly residual income by creating value and sharing it with others.”
Now you create an Unconscious Priority. This is the hard part. You’re going to want to set apart 4 hours to do this section alone and away from distractions. During this time write out your target objective 100 times. Yes that’s right, physically write it out 100 times. This is obviously going to be difficult and its supposed to be. You’re going to want to stop, you’re going to get annoyed, you’re going to have feelings that make you want to stop. It’s going to happen several times throughout the process. Take note of these feelings. Pause and let yourself feel them. Put a label on your emotional state and check your body feeling. Are you really bored or are your eyes falling, are you tired or is your back aching? Label them as actual body sensations not emotional or circumstantial feelings. These are roadblocks. These roadblocks are going to tell you that you don’t need to keep writing and that it’s not important. These are the same roadblocks that pull you to quit when you’re ahead and sabotage yourself.
To remove these roadblocks you need to think back to an old memory when you felt these same body feelings. When was the last time you felt that anxiety you’re feeling now? Now ask yourself these questions: could I let this feeling go? was I willing to let it go? and when? Make the decision now to let those feelings go.
The last step is to create a new perfect memory. Did you know that you can actually change your memories? Every time that you bring up a memory, you are only recalling the memory as you last recalled it. So you can change it. You can associate the feelings you have with a new good memory. Go ahead and change the details in your memory into anything you want. Rob used the example of a boy coming to his father with an idea and his father dismissing it and turned that memory into the boy coming to his father and his father getting up excited and ready to put the idea to work! Be creative, its YOUR memory. Make it as amazing as you want.
Continue to do this until you finish writing your objective. Now that you have finished make it a daily habit to visualize and say your objective out loud several times a day. This is going to help you overcome those feelings that keep you from achieving your dreams and goals. No longer will you self sabotage yourself because you know have the tools to overcome the feelings that are holding you back! You have the tools to overcome the beliefs that are holding you back. You no longer have to live in desperation.