I’ve always wanted to help people.
I would sit and listen to my cousin talk about her problems and I’d give her advice. I did the same with my mom. I liked that they put into action what we talked about.
My first instinct when someone tells me their problem is to start looking for solutions. They say that the problem with men is that they think up solutions when the woman just wants to be listened to.
I’m the opposite! I can go to someone if I need ideas but I listen to myself all day long. It’s always hard for me when I try to help someone and they don’t want the help.
It’s causes cognitive dissonance. I feel frustrated. How can a solution, so easily available, not be taken!??
This is something I constantly need to work on! Growing up, I would take any help and any advice I was given. I treated it like gold. Nothing felt more special. So it’s confusing when others don’t respond the same way. I see a problem… I see a solution… And there I go….I come off wayyy to strong!
Patience has never been my strong suit! I remember taking walks with Tony when we were first dating and I would always try to cut through people’s yards. He would take my hand and force me to stay on the sidewalk… I’d feel the anxiety and frustration building up only to realize that we still got to where we were going and the world didn’t end.
Sometimes that’s what I have to realize, it’s not always my journey, it’s someone else’s. Sometimes what I need to do is just hold on to that person’s hand and walk slowly on the sidewalk with them until they get to their destination.
The world won’t end.